Fire Jose Mourinho

I write this still slightly in shock; I don't listen to R4 in the mornings so I only found out courtesy of the back of someone's newspaper in the bus this morning. I am upset because he is brilliant and I love him; the future now will likely be a galactico model necessary to hold on to fans in the US and the Far East who happily and cheerfully switch their team allegiance season-by-season. I find this uninspiring. I sit, of course, braced for the weekend shit-avalanche of barely thought-through cant from the pundits; over-rated Jose (to be over-rated is the biggest sin, in anything, period); boring Chelsea; boring, boring Chelsea. The best I've read so far is Martin Samuel in the Times, in particular:

Abramovich’s demands are simple. He wants his players to win every trophy in sight, while balancing the ball on their noses like sea lions.

I'll say it now, as a tiny, preemptive strike against the welter of abuse that will soon be directed to my team: stepovers do not good football make. Nor does passing football. I concede that the Invincibles were the best team of the modern era, but they were one of a kind - there is something uniquely depressing about watching the pass-pass-pass-pass-pass-pass-pass-pass-fluff of Arsenal on an off day (or season). Equally, there was something uniquely beautiful in Mourinho's Chelsea - players subjugated to the team ethic, always giving 100% effort: an almost Germanic efficiency. When it worked, it was thrilling - subtly so. A Scouse-supporting friend once posited that people's reaction to Peter Crouch's early troubles at Liverpool served as a litmus test to them knowing anything about football: the ones who slated him don't, basically. I feel the same about Mourinho-era (aargh the past tense!) Chelsea.